🌿 Section 1: Values & Vision

Reconnecting with what matters most.

Healthy intimacy starts when two people share a vision and understand what truly gives their relationship meaning.

1. How aligned do you feel with your partner about what makes life meaningful?

A. Not aligned at all

B. Some overlap, but we often differ

C. Mostly aligned, with some differences

D. Deeply aligned in values and priorities

2. How clearly do you know your partner’s current goals or dreams?

A. I’m not sure what they’re focused on

B. I know a few things, but not the details

C. I have a good sense of what they want next

D. I could describe their goals vividly

3. When you picture your ideal relationship, how similar do you think it is to your partner’s vision?

A. Completely different

B. Somewhat similar

C. Mostly similar

D. Very aligned and shared

4. How often do you talk about what you both want for your future together?

A. Rarely

B. Occasionally

C. Often

D. Regularly and with excitement

5. How much do shared experiences still bring you joy or meaning?

A. We’ve drifted apart

B. Sometimes, depending on the mood

C. Usually—they reconnect us

D. Always—they remind us why we’re a team

🌷 Section 2: Old Patterns

Recognizing what keeps repeating and choosing something new.

Patterns reveal how we protect ourselves, but also where we get stuck. Awareness creates choice.

6. When conflict arises, how do you usually respond?

A. I shut down or withdraw

B. I react defensively

C. I try to calm down and talk

D. I pause, reflect, and respond with care

7. How often do you notice the same argument happening again and again?

A. Almost every time

B. Often

C. Occasionally

D. Rarely

8. How aware are you of what triggers your emotional reactions?

A. Not very

B. Sometimes

C. Usually

D. Very aware and able to manage them

9. How well do you and your partner repair after a disagreement?

A. We avoid it or move on without resolution

B. We patch things up but don’t go deep

C. We talk it through most of the time

D. We repair fully and feel closer afterward

10. How often do you both acknowledge your role in the tension?

A. Rarely

B. Sometimes

C. Often

D. Consistently and respectfully

💗 Section 3: Inner Feelings

Learning to speak the language of emotions.

Emotional intimacy grows when both people feel safe sharing what’s beneath the surface.

11. How well do you recognize your partner’s emotional states (even when they don’t say much)?

A. I usually can’t tell

B. Sometimes I sense it

C. Often I can read them accurately

D. Almost always

12. When your partner shares something vulnerable, how do you usually respond?

A. I change the subject

B. I listen but don’t know what to say

C. I try to comfort them

D. I listen fully and validate their feelings

13. How often do you talk about emotions openly?

A. Rarely

B. Occasionally

C. Often

D. Regularly and meaningfully

14. How emotionally safe do you believe your partner feels with you?

A. Not very safe

B. Somewhat safe

C. Mostly safe

D. Fully safe and open

15. How often do you express appreciation for your partner in small, everyday ways?

A. Rarely

B. Sometimes

C. Often

D. Daily

🌺 Section 4: Committed Compassion

Turning care into consistent action.

Love grows through compassion and consistency, the willingness to understand each other’s reality with empathy.

16. When tension arises, how confident are you that you can calm things down respectfully?

A. Not confident

B. Somewhat confident

C. Fairly confident

D. Very confident

17. When your partner shares something difficult, how do you usually listen?

A. I interrupt or defend myself

B. I try to listen but struggle

C. I listen quietly and respond thoughtfully

D. I mirror, validate, and stay grounded

18. How often do you express empathy during a disagreement (even when upset)?

A. Rarely

B. Occasionally

C. Often

D. Almost always

19. When conflict happens, how quickly do you move toward repair?

A. It can take days

B. One of us caves eventually

C. We talk things through soon after

D. We repair quickly and feel closer

20. How balanced does the partnership feel overall?

A. One gives more than the other

B. It shifts a lot

C. Fairly balanced

D. Mutually supportive and equal

🌈 Section 5: Connection & Communication

Building emotional safety, curiosity, and lasting friendship.

Connection thrives when both partners feel seen, heard, and known.

21. How intentionally do you make time to connect beyond logistics?

A. Rarely

B. Occasionally

C. Often

D. Regularly and with intention

22. How often do you feel truly understood when you communicate?

A. Rarely

B. Sometimes

C. Often

D. Consistently

23. How do you handle small misunderstandings before they grow?

A. Ignore them

B. Address them tensely

C. Discuss calmly

D. Clarify and move forward quickly

24. How much curiosity do you bring into your partner’s thoughts and dreams?

A. Rarely ask

B. Occasionally

C. Often

D. Always—love discovering new things

25. How emotionally connected do you feel after time together?

A. Often distant

B. Sometimes connected

C. Usually connected

D. Deeply connected and recharged

26. How equally do you share influence in decisions?

A. One dominates

B. Uneven compromise

C. Mostly fair

D. Fully shared partnership